What Ben Taught Me

As I reflect on the past two years that Ben and I spent together, I realize that he has taught me way more than just how to be a better rider, but how to be a better person overall. Here is a list of things I wrote down the night after Ben passed away. I couldn't sleep very well that night so in tears I started writing down all of the things I've learned from him. It's amazing to me how strong the horse - human connection is and how much we can really learn from their quiet souls if we allow ourselves to mold with them.

-Trust

-Companionship

-Patience

-Love

-Loyalty

-Responsibility

-That I can't just do it all

-To be giving and light with my hands

-To not get in a fight but find other solutions to the problem

-To budget and be responsible with my money. Plan ahead!

-Body awareness

-To adjust my own position and balance first and then get the horse to follow under me

-Training takes time

-Creating harmony

-To have a set plan or expectations each time I ride and not just correct mistakes

-That every horse has hidden potential and once the horse trusts you they will be able to show it to you

-To overcome your fears and not let them interfere with your riding

-That horses are sensitive souls and can read your emotions

-That Ben would never harm anyone or anything

-How protective horses can be of their owners, remembering the one time I fell off of him in the woods and he could have easily galloped all the way home but instead stopped in his tracks and stood by me until I was able to stand up and mount him again and ride him home despite my pain.

-How dependent horses are on people and on each other for companionship and love. All he really wanted before I bought him was a friend and someone to create a relationship of trust with.

-How I will never own just one horse because they are too lonely by themselves. Every time I road him to Barnabee Jena would stand at the bottom of the field bidding him goodbye and would faithfully be there again waiting for his return. They would nicker to each other from the road and sniff noses once they were close enough again at the fence. Whenever Jena would hear us walking up she'd come running down to the bottom gate to greet us.

-How a horse can be dull to road noise but supper sensitive to something out of the ordinary like a plastic bag on the side of the road, or something that had been slightly moved or misplaced.

-How aware horses are to their surrounding and they don't like sudden change. Routine is best!

-That balancing riding and taking care of young children is super hard without the help of family and friends

-That every mom needs an out: an activity that they truly enjoy in which they can find themselves and focus on their own needs and no one else's for a few hours. Me time!

Thank you Ben for teaching me these important lessons and I hope that I'll be able to validate your life each day by demonstrating how I've grown in each of these areas for having spent the past two years of our lives together.