Kids vs. Horses

I was finally able to meet up with my trainer Ulla for a lesson today. It's been over a month since my last one and it was great to get some insight again. Ben was acting really scared of the east end of the arena today. Especially in the corner where Ulla usually sits, he was shying away every time we passed. A few times it was really bad and he didn't even want to approach it and I had to keep all of my aides on and not loose any contact as I passed. He jumped and shyed, bucked and kicked, twisted and bounced all over the place. Luckily I have a very good seat and stayed with him the whole time. A few times I felt like I was riding in a rodeo! But there was NO WAY I was going to let him get me off. Sorry Ben, I'm stuck to you like GLUE! It's a good thing too, because I really don't want to fall off. The last time I slipped off was about 7 years ago when I was still into jumping and I twisted my wrist in the process. That was no fun! But since then I've had a very solid record for staying in the saddle....knock on wood!

While Ben was throwing his fits today, Ulla mentioned that I needed to view him like a child throwing a tantrum. I've definitely got experience there! She said to just ignore him and keep asking him to do what I want him to do, be consistent and don't give up. Don't reward him by responding to him verbally, even if you are saying "NO!" or "STOP IT!" because he's looking for a response, even if it's a negative one. Only until he starts to relax and give you what you've been asking him to do is it okay to reward him by lightening up the aides. Ben has two ways of evading: resisting by throwing a fit or rushing. Both show that he is not willing to listen and trying to avoid what I'm asking of him.

Despite his tantrums today, we were overall successful. By the end of the lesson I had managed to keep him forward in all of the gaits and calmly move past all of the "scary" things at the end of the arena. I just have to remember when riding Ben to always be one step ahead of him, not only with my eyes and focus, but in everything that I'm asking of him. Don't just anticipate him acting out, but think about what he will be like afterwards so that I'm not sending him a tense or nervous message.

Ulla also commented that I'm lucky that I'm so patient. I had to laugh under my breath, because this seems to be an on-going battle with me. In riding I can be patient, but with my kids, sometimes I just loose it. Owning a horse requires a lot of commitment, which I love to give, but so does raising kids. It's no wonder most horse women have to choose "Kids vs. Horses." They both take a life long to raise and you have to take one step at a time. Who knew that while riding (which was supposed to be my break from my kids) that I would be learning so much more about how to be a better parent. I guess it all goes hand in hand, like it says in Proverbs 22:6 "Train up a child [horse] in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it."